everything is about perspective, right? life, religion, happiness, relationships, work and yes, losing weight. sure, i'm still losing weight slowly. i think my average is about 2 lbs. a week. in the grand scheme of things, i should be thrilled, ecstatic even. but here i am, thinking that it should be coming off faster. realistically, i know that this isn't much of an option for me. to lose weight any faster, i would most likely have to be working out 4-5 hours a day, eating much stricter and risk the bounce-back effect. ah yes, that dreaded bounce-back. anyone who has struggled with weight and gone on any number of 'fad' diets knows what the 'bounce-back' is. you follow some ridiculous and extreme diet and the weight drops off faster than ever. then you go back to the 'normal' eating or your life-long habits and boom! the weight bounces right back on. it can be a vicious cycle. i've done it for years. drop 10-15 lbs. and then go back to the old habits just to regain that weight (and usually a few lbs. more). right now i'm at battle with myself to not resort to the fad diets. there are so many reasons against them and really, if i just look at the numbers, i can see that what i'm doing is working.

so here's where i'm at:

total lost in 6 weeks: 22 lbs.
fat % loss: 11%
lean muscle gain: 12 lbs.

when i look at it that way, i'm happy. look at those numbers! there's my proof that all of my hard work is paying off. sure, i'm not the perfect model of weight loss. i still eat things i shouldn't. i still am obsessed with working out and feel guilty if i take even one day off even though i know my body needs that one day. i'm human. i make mistakes. i struggle every single day with my inner voice of self doubt. i need to keep on keepin' on. my hard work is paying off. i just need to stop and smell the roses every once in a while.