being honest

The last 2 weeks have been the most emotionally draining, exhausting weeks I've had in a very long time. I'm full of anger and sadness all at once. I won't be going into details, but let's just say that I hope to never experience these emotions again.

So, here's the real honesty. The last 2 weeks I've lived basically on fast food. Lunch, dinner, red bull. I'm disgusted with myself and there's not really any excuse. I was busy, hurting, trying to just make it through each day with some sort of functionality. I've gained probably 10 lbs. Sure, most of it will be water retention from the sodium, but some of it is certainly from my diet of taco bells and sonics. I woke up monday morning ready to get back to my own life. I'm on the right eating track, planning ahead. I even went and played tennis for a while yesterday. I'm teaching double spins tonight too. I hate the bumps in the road, but it's definitely another great reminder that of this:

Happiness isn't something ready made. It comes from your own actions.

I love when things go the way I want. When I can see results after working so hard at something. This weeks weigh-in update.... down 3 more lbs.!! Hooray! I am still shrinking, still on a mission and that much closer to all of my goals. Now I am just a measley 6 lbs. from the -150 mark. 6 lbs. I can do it! I plan on a lot of extra workouts, being back on my plan 87% (a girl needs some wine every once in a while) and really just all around kicking ass. I am planning to post a 'before' and after picture for all to see... however, the only pic I can find is me about 15 lbs. lighter than my heaviest. Although, I am pretty sure that when you are that big, 15 lbs. isn't gonna show.

Happy dance! Happy dance!