Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Today will be a good day. Sure, I'm sick with a head cold and the WORST sore throat in history. My ears are plugged. I'm super whiney. But none of that matters. Why? Because today I finally met a goal I've been working towards for a very long time. Today I registered to be a bone marrow donor.

You might remember me talking about this a while back. I've been wanting to register for a pretty long time, but I've always been too big. There are certain requirements of a donor and one of them is not weighing over a certain amount. Today I woke up and weighed less than the maximum weight. It's also the first time since my sophomore year of high school that I have weighed this little. It's certainly not official since it was just on my scale at home (which I know runs about 2 lbs heavier than the doctors office). Who cares? Not me... because seeing any number less than where I've been is always a good thing.

The past few weeks have been kind of a whirlwind. I've lost someone I love to cancer and someone I knew a long time ago to another type of cancer. Through times like these, I always want to slip back into the old habit of feeding my feelings. I want to be sad. I want to throw things. I want to go buy a case of beer and some chips and put myself into a carb-laden coma. But times have changed and I'm not really that person anymore. The person who looks to food for comfort. The girl who hides behind her pizza and popcorn and salty treats. The girl who sits on the sidelines wanting to be in the race. Who I am now is the girl who will take a medicine ball to the face during training and keep working because pain is temporary. Who I am now is the girl who chooses to use food as fuel, not as a friend. The one who will push myself until I have nothing left to give. Today I'm the girl who is embracing life each and every day, trying to accept myself at face value and reaching my goals.

This is the life of a go-getta.

RIP Grandma Girlie and Greg. You will both be missed tremendously.

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