Monday, May 16, 2011

I'm super grumpy today. I have had no sleep and it's monday. I am feeling down and stressed over things I have little to no control over. I'm tired, both literally and in general. Tired from lack of sleep, but tired of feeling like no matter what I do and accomplish, to some people it's never good enough. And so my friends, I ask you this: when will I stop allowing people to make me feel negatively about myself? I ask this because no matter how much weigh I lose, there will always be someone who has lost more. There will always be that person who does such and such as a workout, which seems to downplay all of my workouts. There will always be someone who loses weight faster, runs faster, works out more, eats 'better', etc... than me. Why do I allow all of those things to bug me? It doesn't happen all the time... but every once in a while, these things weigh on me. They eat away at my self confidence, at me. I need to fix this, but then isn't this the plight of most women? There will always be someone to compare yourself or be compared to. Whether you are a size 0 or are a size 20... it is what it is. I need to focus on myself. That's really what it boils down to. Focusing on all of the things that I have control over like my workouts, my eating, dressing a little nicer, putting on a little makeup every once in a while... All of the things that boost my confidence because they make me feel like a better person. Hard work pays off, but you can't diminish the effectiveness of throwing on a cute dress and some heels in boosting self confidence.

Here's the latest weigh in update:

total lost in 12 weeks: 37 lbs. (total since starting at doc office is 43!!)
total fat % lost: -4% this week!!
lean muscle gain: 6 lbs. (lost 10 lbs. of body fat)

I am now 32 lbs. away from my next weight loss goal. 32 lbs. It's so close I can feel it. I am also putting this in writing because I plan on kicking some serious ass. My husband has made the mistake of betting me $492.00 (it was the first number that came to my head ok!) that I cannot get under 180. Umm. I hope he realizes that I am not the kind of girl you tell 'can't do something'. He better get his checkbook ready, cause I'm about to make him eat his words.

1 comment:

  1. You can do it girl! Take the money from the hubby!!! What type of diet are you doing? Where do you get your measurements? I'd love to have some of those numbers!!!! Send me a note! :) Mel